I just can't give it up. I feel it in my soul, but I'm so desperately frustrated and depressed by the situation. There are so, so, so many needy, needy children. There are so, so, so many unappreciative and degrading parents. Everyday is like going to war and every night I find myself searching for new answers, new ways, something to make it work. It's living hell. As a child I was magical with children. When I work with small groups I can make children learn, imagine, think, and reason. My large classroom presents so many social problems, behavioral problems, and needs - that I'm lucky to get through five minutes of learning. My school is so deplete when it comes to management or organization, that it is survival of the fittest. I've been fretting for hours tonight over the state of things and just think, with a positive environment, I could have put those hours towards positive work. Thanks for giving me a forum to vent.